The landlady clapped her hands together and smiled because she did like a happy ending. She was so pleased she leant over and kissed the Old Codger on the lips. The Old Codger leapt back in horror. “What are you doing woman!”, he said as he rubbed his hand across his mouth trying to erase the memory of that kiss. “Oh you looked so hunky I could not resist it”.

The twins laughed as did their parents who were standing in the doorway. “Hhrmph”, said the Old Codger not at all impressed. He picked up his bag and made a dash for the door before the landlady could grab him. “Do come back soon” she shouted after him.

The Old Codger would never come back to Blackpool. He took the coach back to Wiggington and was mightily glad when he finally got back to the railway allotments.

His first thought was to check his leeks in case Mr. Jones had tampered with them. As he went to look a piece of twine got caught round his legs and almost tripped him up. There was a rumbling sound above him and he walked round to have a look. He saw a paint pot rolling down the roof of his shed and remembered his booby trap for Mr. Jones. He knew he would be in big trouble if someone saw him at the moment the paint landed in Mr. Jones’s leeks, so he ran to stop it.

The paint pot flew through the air and the Old Codger got ready to catch it. He positioned himself under it with his arms up and clapped his hands round the tin at just the right moment. However the lid of the paint pot was not on very securely and it fell off and all the Pastel Pink paint went over the Old Codger’s sunburnt head and down his neck. It was a far from perfect end to a far from perfect holiday.

The end

© Nick 1999